"Well, which one are you then"

"I rear-ended a car this morning. So there we are alongside the road and
slowly the driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just get sooo
stressed and life seems to get funny?

Well, I could NOT believe it . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car,
looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"
So, I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?"... and
THAT'S when the fight started . . ."
From a random web page





It was like every other night I was just getting out of my figure drawing class. I started to walk to my car that was on the other side of campus by the science labs; since thats where my first class was for the day.

I got in my 1990 Toyota Corolla and slipped in a new cd I had just purchased. I pulled out of my parking space, drove to the exit and remembered that I had left my charcoal in the art room.

I got to a T intersection which BTW had no stop or yield for me b/c I was going straight. Before I got to the intersection a truck made his stop and turned left on the straight road. Once he had made his turn a blue 1994 Mazda Miata decided that he could make the run WITH OUT stopping. "California roll" if you will. I was going my speed limit and I didn't see his fucking piece of shit car b/c guess what? He had his driving lights off.

I felt like a rhino had rammed the front right side of my car. I had no idea what the fuck just happened. I looked around, shook my head and tried to understand the events that just perspired.

I got out of my car once I remembered where I was. Everything was dark all I could make out was his car and my one remaining head light.

Before he got out of his car I was all ready out side screaming at the top of my lungs. He got out and I had to pause... the guy was around 6'5" thin. (for those of you that don't know me I'm 5'3")I didn't care I kept yelling and trowing up my arm in a fit of anger.

He asked me calmly to stop yelling and that he was really sorry.
"SORRY?" I said
"Your Sorry for your stupidity?"

I think he might have been high; the back of the campus was the place where students would get high before or after classes. He didn't say much. I got his information and drove off pissed that my ugly car was now uglier.

I don't remember if his car had any damage. I don't think there was even a scratch on his car. His fathers insurance did take care of the damages. I mostly spoke to his father. He was so apologetic. He did ask me at one point how tall I was. I found that funny

So the lesson here is don't fuck with small people. We will fight back.

From the Lounge to the Sushi Bar

Back in 2001 I came across this store called Limbo Lounge. It had all sorts of flashy cloths. This place was comply diffrent from any other store in Sunvalley Mall. It was more Retro. Wet Seal in circa 1965.
Limbo lounge was under the Wet seal umbrella. We had one Wet seal and one Contempo Causals right across the way from each other. I really don't know why they even had a Contempo Causals because they sold the same shit that they had in Wet Seal.





What I loved about this Limbo Lounge was that they sold mens cloths.
Many of you remember Limbo Lounge a place where you could find classic Elvis lunch box's Betty Page action figue mixed in with bowling shirts that had the name Chuck with a leopard collar.


When I started working there, I was in my sophomore year of high school. I was so excited to start working at Sunvally mall. I first met Gayel. She was the acting manager at the time. I come to find out that this store had no actual manager. So we had the store all to your selfs at times. This was by far the best job I ever had. We would play those music videos hella loud and of course I would dance along to some of the videos.

My co workers where Brandi (cashier/greeter), Gayleen (key holder), Gayel(acting manager) and Felix (cashier/Greeter). Since I was new I didn't get to use a register I was doing go backs and helping customers in the fitting rooms.

This story is not about how much I miss the store but about Felix my co worker; a Japanese/American boy that spent 30 min each morning spiking up his 8 inch blond hair.

One day he went to his 30 min lunch. He came back 10 min later with this look on his face like some one just slapped him with a rotten fish.
So i asked him...

"What happened to you? You look pissed?"

"I almost got in a fight at Mcdonalds.!"

"Why?"

" There was this fucking dumb ass mother fucker that was standing behind me and said my hair looked like fucking French fries..."

"...HAHAHAHA... Guess he was really hungry or high. It doesn't look like fries... hehe"

everybody but him found that funny.

Time went by and We all got other job after the fun died out. We finally got a manaer but by that time Wet Seal made it go bankrupted and that small store turned into another wet seal.

So now we have One big Wet Seal up stairs a Contempo across the way and now down stairs another FUCKING Wet seal discount store. It didn't last long. Wet Seal could not keep that store open after the "Bunny" fiasco.




Years went by and Brandi and I still talked and hung out once and a while. I lost contact with every body else.


The other night while on my friends birthday dinner at Sushi Grove. I got there really early because I knew that Walnut Creek during the Christmas holidays was going to be hard to find parking. Once I finally found parking (4 blocks away) I went to the bar to wait for my party.




I sat down and took off my hoodie and scarf. I looked to my left where the bartender was. I was trying really hard to get his attention. My boobs where not big enough on that night. I gave up after a while and I just sat there looking at all the pretty lights and wondering why the DJ was playing the music so loud.

I heard a faint voice call my name. I looked behind me then to my left then to my right towards the door. I ignored it; maybe it was some other guy name Dan they where calling. Then I heard it again. This time a bit louder. I found my self looking right into Felix's face. He was rolling the sushi.

We talked for a while about our good time at Limbo Lounge. He told me that he was married and had a 3 month year old baby girl. He was wearing a hat so I could not tell if his hair was still the same. I doubt it, I mean my hair back then was green and blue at one point purple. But I still wanted to ask "when did you decide that your hair really did look like fries?"

It seems like all of my friends are having babies and getting married. As a gay man I don't feel left out but I never dreamed about one day all of us growing up so fast.

"This is the best hot dog ever Danny!"

One night after The Crib-

The night was almost over. I was covered from head to toe in sweat. The Dj was playing his last set. So I set out to try to find Bri; see we always had this thing about splitting up so I could find my self a boy to take home. Unfortunately this was not one of those nights. I found Bri and told her I was ready when she was.

I was mostly sober since I was driving, Bri was another story.

We both started to walk out of the club. On our way out I stopped to talk to a few guys that I was flirting with that night. One was this guy that worked for Gus checking the guest list in and passing out the VIP tickets. I thought he was hot b/c he was this short and stocky guy with an orange motorcycle that had a Chinese's cherater on it's side. Don't ask me what it is said.

While I was making plans to see when would be the best night to go to his house ;) something in my peripheral vision caught my attention. Bri was trying with all her might to get on top of his motorcycle. Poor girl. She didn't quite make it. Instead of stopping on top of the seat she just kept going to the side and fell on her ass. Both the "Ticket boy" and I tried helping her from the ground. She could not stop laughing .

Once in the car we stared to relive the exciting points of the night. I was going to stay the night at her house in Moraga since I had to work the next day in Lafayette. On our way to her house we decided to stop by 7 eleven to get some midnight munchis. I got nocho's and a slurpee, she got a hot dog.

Still Drunk as fuck Bri forgot she had just bought a hot dog. Once she realized this she threw her arms in the air and said "... oh my God Danny, I have a hot dog and Im not eating it." at the same time she said this her hot dog fell on the floor on my 1990 Toyota Corola. Witch btw was dirty as hell. I have never cleaned the floor on this car b/c it was a piece O' shit.
Oh Briana this was not your night.
With out any hesitation she reaches for the hot dog, now on the floor and out of it's rapper and procceds to take a big juciy bite. But was Bri faded? God no! She enjoyed that hot dog like it was the last hot do she would ever have. What gets me was that shorty after she swallowed the first bite she turns to me and saids

"This is the best hot dog ever Danny!"
I LOVE YOU BRI.

Hold on to the Night

If time were on our side.
we wouldn't have to fight to keep this night.
The touch of his skin is like a dream.
My imagination was built for him.

If I awake before you go.
I'll try not to forget how you feel.
I will fight so hard to try to see you.
All I feel is love fading further.

So Promise to hold on to the night, and I know that we'll be meeting soon.
The night I long for, you long for.
Can't you see I can't stop dreaming of us.

I take a few steps back.
Until now I forgot your blue eyes.
Is that what i feel pricing me?
I'm scared to see you, my own heart could burst if we don't meet.
I have to dream even if I'm forced to struggle.

I'm standing in your room as if we were strangers in a crowd. There is no need for words or speaking when both our hears know who we are.


By: DHR Torres

Meet me in my dreams

The door swung open. My girl friend walked in as I followed in her steps.
The room was small. Almost the size and shape of most hotel room. except this was not a hotel. some how I have been in this room before. The room looked like Jonathan's bed room. But some how I knew we were not in his house.

Nobody was in when we arrived. My friend went looking around the other rooms. I looked around to find a hint as to who's room I was in. I walked over to the right side of the bed. I wanted to look in the drawer I knew his Gun was in there. I stopped and looked around again. I was here again.

My friend came back from the back door. we were both tired so we slipped in the bed together.

Midnight. I woke up to a smooth soft skin. I knew none of us got naked when we got under the sheets. Could my friend have gotten naked in the middle of the night?

As my hands keep'd feeling around in the dark trying to figure out who this was. I felt hands move up and down my body. It felt good. Nothing was telling me to stop. I didn't feel bad or naughty. i just wanted to know who this was between my friend and I.

It was Jonathan . He was back home. Naked in the bed with me. I felt like never stopping. I wanted him allover me. The lights came on. My friend was finally awake. she moved to another room with out one word. Jon and I started kissing and touching and licking every inch of our body's. We didn't have sex.

Next morning we woke up and started to pack my things. My friend never came back. I kissed him good bye, and told him i would see him soon.

My dream ended.

I wanted to et back in my dream once i woke up. Iv only seen Jon in my dreams since the last time we hung out. he's mostly in my dreams in a high place, like a window or balcony. I have never spoken to him in any of my dreams.
From what i know he's still alive. The last i heard o him he was on Myspace he was married and happy.

To The Stoner Who Works At Pizza Hut

You: the guy who answers the phone at pizza hut
Me: Hungry and stoned out of my mind

I called you from my cell phone but had completely forgot who I was calling by the time you answered the phone. Of course, you were also baked to bajeezus and forgot to tell me that I had called the Hut.

When you answered and said, “Whatsup?” I thought about it, and after a 20 second pause I told you that was hungry. You suggested I try a pizza, and I agreed that it was probably a good idea.

Then I asked you if you sold pizza and you said that you could make me one. I said I wanted anchovies and something else on my pizza. You asked me what that something else was.

We spent five minutes listing toppings until we figured out that I was trying to remember how to say: “Sun dried Tomatoes.” When you said: “We'll bake that right up for you,” we both started laughing uncontrollably.

It was the best pizza I ever had; I just wanted to thank you for helping me out.